My First Times – Kisses, Love and Loving Myself

# My first kiss
If kissing catchers in nursery school counts then V would be my first kiss. Disappointing is what that was because I was madly in love with this other boy R who refused to ever kiss me after that.

My real first kiss was with a boy called G. It was a week after I had my braces removed so at the end of my Grade 9 year (15 years old). Again, disappointment. Ending up with slobber on my face was not what I had envisioned or even received when practicing on my hand. Yuk Yuk Yuk. Things got better after that, THANK GOD!!

# The first time I fell in love

First time I fell in love (but real love, not the kind in primary school with L), was with my first serious boyfriend. M. I thought he was perfect for me, only time would proveotherwise. Age= 18
# The first time I told someone I loved them

The first time I told M that I loved him, he looked me in the eye like he was going to say it back, but instead told me that he had cheated on me the night before. Talk about a blow to my self-esteem. Never again will I ever tell someone I love them without very very careful consideration of whether or not they deserve it.
# The first time someone told me they loved me

The first time someone told me that they loved me (M) was during a fight about the fact that he had cheated on me. I suppose he thought that in saying it, I would miraculously forgive him. I never did and our relationship from then on (which lasted for far too long after that) was based on insecurity and heart break which happened more times than I am proud of.
# The first time my heart was broken

The same night I told someone that I was in love with them.
# The first time I loved who I was

I had a mini epiphany the other day, so at the age of 22. Very very sad but being cheated on constantly for three years will do that to a person.

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