The first time I was stood up was gut wrenchingly embarrassing. It was also very heartbreaking. I had just broken up from an almost four year relationship that had ended in a mess. I was sad, feeling unloved and desperate to meet someone that liked me and made me forget about the heartbreak I was feeling from my failed relationship. Meeting James was just what I thought I needed (was I wrong!)

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A trip up to Joburg to visit a very good friend was a great way to distract myself from the pain I was still feeling over the relationship ending. One night we went out for an old school friend’s birthday. The night was going okay, my friend and I felt a little left out as we didn’t really know our school friends new mates in Joburg. Quite late into the night a friend of hers arrived, a tall attractive looking guy with brown curly hair and amazing eyes…and he wanted to talk to ME. We spent most of the night chatting and had a great time.

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The next day he sms’d me and said he wanted to see me again. We met up at a local pub with my friend from school and one of his friends. He was charming, sweet, affectionate and awesome. Towards the end of the night, he asked me about how I was going to be getting to the airport the next morning. I was quite sad that I was going to be going home, after meeting someone I wanted to get to know more and thinking he wanted to get to know me too. He quickly offered to meet me at a local shopping centre (near my friend who I was staying with’s work). Then he said we would spend the morning together and he would take me to the airport. What a gentleman! I quickly refused, saying I was going to be getting a taxi and that he shouldn’t worry. He insisted, I said okay. We said goodbye, he gave me a big kiss.

The next morning my friend dropped me off at the shopping centre. I was meeting a university friend for breakfast, then James would meet me afterwards. I was excited as I hugged my friend hello and told her all the gossip from the weekend and my latest romance. She was super excited for me, knowing how sad I had been over my ex. He was meant to meet me at 10am. It got to 10.30 and I thought I better try and call him. NO ANSWER. I sms’d him. NO REPLY. At the time, I didn’t even think that he might have stood me up. I naively thought that maybe he had lost his phone the night before (being a bit tipsy) and now couldn’t get hold of me! It got to about 11 and I started to doubt the “genuineness” of this guy. My friend had stuck around luckily and gave me a lift to the airport. The whole trip to the airport entailed me checking my phone every 2 mins. NOTHING.

I arrived home feeling bitter and angry. How could someone have appeared so lovely, only to be like every other guy that had treated me badly.  I even thought I should message him on FB, which was probably not the best thing to do at the time. I never got a reply to my message which talked about the lack of respect he showed me by not showing up, or leaving me a message to say “Sorry I can’t make it”.

At the time I felt really gutted about this experience. Now- not so much. I am in a lovely relationship with an awesome guy who I would never compare to the coward who stood me up.

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